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Charlotte. I'm not a psychopath, I'm a high-functioning sociopath. Check your facts.

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Sunday, March 26, 2017
Best to you

This week has been a bit of an odd one but I know next week will be busy af so the last thing I'll want to do is write about this one as well!

Sunday, Monday and Tuesday I felt horrible (which I now realise is because my vitamin B12 hadn't had time to sink in yet) so I really didn't do much at all, and then on Wednesday there was an attack on Parliament...

It's weird because in years to come I can say that I was there in the biggest terror attack (seeing as no motive has been firmly established I am cautious about using the word terror) since 7/7. We were going to go for a cigarette but an MP rushed and started shouting at us, and we thought it was a joke but it was an actual terror attack and we were watching it on the BBC. We were cooped up until 8pm and it was boring af but we sat in Stephen Timms' office and had biscuits and wine so that made it a bit more bearable, and actually getting out was an absolute nightmare! It took ages and I had to get an uber to the pub that I was meant to have met my uni friends at two and a half hours earlier but finally got there.

Had a glass of wine and a sambuca shot because I was so done with the situation, and it was Nour, Rebecca, Kathrine, Sam, Holly and Ellie and it was v nice indeed!

On Thursday I worked from home for obvious reasons lol and then in the evening went to Amy's house, and her mum had left us a curry she'd cooked and we had that and cheesecakes and drinks and listened to music and chatted allllll evening, and it was sooooo nice!

Friday work was really stressful but in the evening, me and mum went for a Jolly's for Mother's Day and it was sooooo lovely, then had a chill at home :-) Saturday I went to the gym, then Hounslow, and then in the evening out to Drapers for Merger Cup with Sof, Emilie, Cecilie and a couple of other really nice Norwegian girls that I hadn't really met before, and it was a really fun night!

Today I just died slowly and then helped mum mow nan and grandad's lawns, and then we went for a Starbucks and it was v nice!

Posted at 09:31 am by ArghNotThePony
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Saturday, March 18, 2017
Number 1 angel

I've done quite a lot since the last entry (I must sound so fucking boring from my entries in here. There is literally no character. This is a list of my life. 35-year-old me, are you happy with this? Really?)

  • The Monday after my birthday I did a half day at work and then went shopping with Eline and Vilde which was soooo nice, only bought some skincare but it was really nice, and we went to Pizza Express afterwards which felt like a proper treat. Then Kathrine came to join us, and me and Kathrine went to the Nordic Bar and met all the Scandis and hung out with Sofie, Emilie and Cec for a bit which was really nice
  • Had a nice lunch in St. James' Park with Kathrine on one of the nicest days we've had so far this year, and after work went to a Tooting CLP event called 'Nevertheless She Persisted' and it was so inspirational, some really cool women got up and did their shit
  • Went to the gym a few times and saw nan and grandad obv, which was nice, and grandad was on his steroids and being proper sassy which was great!
  • On the Saturday me and Rachel went to the Victoria Miro in Angel and there was this sick exhibition, it was like a series of rooms made out of mesh with properly intricate detail and it was lovely. After that we went to the Earl of Essex pub and had wine, then beer, and food in their garden and stayed there for ages and it was the first pub garden of the year - I looooove a pub garden and it was such a good day!
  • Beat my PB 5km in the gym on Sunday!
  • Went to Spoons with Amy and Alice to celebrate Alice's new job and it was so nice! We decided to go out on Earth Day (coincidentally) next month and I don't know why we all found it so funny but we did! We had cocktail pitchers like we used to when we were like 19 and it was really really fun
  • Work was good yesterday, I had a chat break with Amy for like an hour which was nice, and then after work came home and got ready to go out. Abi collected me and Rach and then we drove to Acton, sorted stuff out and then went to Sasha's for predrinks. Stayed there for a couple of hours listening to music and talking and then went to Brixton Jamm, the crowd were horrible and so aggressive and the venue was waaaaay too small so it was v sweaty but the music was sick so that was fine! It was a bit of a mixed night but it was v nice to see Sash again
  • I feel weirdly fine today, considering I got in at 5.15am! I went for a coffee with Alice at lunchtime and we were proper in fits of laughter, and in half an hour Rachel is picking me up and then we're going to Abi's, and then to Wagamama because I can't decide whether I like the idea of vegetable katsu curry and I'm going to try it out! Will be a nice chill evening.

Posted at 09:40 am by ArghNotThePony
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Sunday, March 05, 2017
Your doorstep first place podium

I feel like I've done quite a lot since the last entry but I might be kidding myself lol

  • I was at a meeting with TfL which I found pretty interesting and that day I went to the pub with Alice and Carissa who I thought would get on well, and they did which was nice
  • I had annual leave on the Thursday which was soooo nice even though it was the biggest storm day and windy af, me and mum went to the cat cafe which was properly nice and then had a walk down Brick Lane and the vintage shops and obviously Urban Outfitters, where I bought amazing (but expensive) trousers, and also got a pitch to Consented magazine accepted :-)
  • Chilled at Abi's with Rachel on the day that Stormzy and Los Camp! albums came out and they are both SO good
  • On the Saturday, I went to Hounslow and saw my grandparents and then met Nour for a coffee in Brick Lane (fucking £3.50 for a soya matcha latte and yes, I know how awful I am that I ordered that) which was nice, then we went to Rebecca's house and met Ellie and had wine and crisps and a gossip all evening which was v v fun and I enjoyed v much
  • Sunday I went to the gym and had a coffee with Grandad afterwards which was really nice! Then went to grandparents' for a roast and in the evening, chilled with mum watching The Butler which was a really nice way to end the weekend
  • Birthday was OK and went to Cafe Venice with mum in the evening which was really nice!
  • Got a book of Audre Lorde essays and tickets to the Brixton rooftop beach from work :-)
  • Went to a Channel 4 diversity lecture at work and oh my god all the white guys were actually horrendous but Riz Ahmed spoke and he was amazing! Inspiring and even borderline revolutionary, made the day a lot better! After work I went to the gym and had a really good time
  • Friday I worked from the civic centre and it was fine, went for a couple of glasses of wine at the pub with Alice afterwards which I think was just very much needed! I picked up fish and chips for me and mum and we had them and that was nice.
  • Saturday was birthday day! The day was pretty nothingy but then Rachel and Abi came round and Abi had made a Thai Sweet Chilli crisps cake!! It was brilliant, so realistic and I was sooo happy, and then we got on the train very baitly drinking wine lol and it was fuuun. Got up to Sofie, Emilie etc's flat and had pres there, did ring of fire, Mary got me a mug that says 'dick', got a book of drinking games, a bottle of sambuca and a bottle of tequila and Nour got me a bloody print of Los Camp! lyrics which is absolutely amazing and I love v v much
  • We went to the Macbeth and it was really fun, the music (90s vs 00s) was good and I had a good dance but I lost Eline (she came back for it!!!) for a good portion of it and I was really weirdly tired which was a bit annoying, but still had fun! It was realllllyyy nice to see most of my friends and get to hang out with everyone :-) Left and Rachel puked in a drain lmao and we had to sit with this girl whose friends had abandoned her and was too fucked to leave so getting home took quite a while but it was still a really fun night and I enjoyed it loads!

Posted at 08:43 am by ArghNotThePony
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Monday, February 20, 2017
Brand brand new

So, the last week has been mildly eventful lol

Last Monday Abi and Rachel came to work and we did a tour and went out on the terrace and it was v fun indeed, after work I met them at a pub/bar thing called Studio 6 and Coleen Nolan was there looking haggard af and it was jokes

Tuesday was boring af but I went to the gym afterwards and really enjoyed it. Work was fine on Wednesday, we had a team meeting in All Bar One which was interesting and then I went to Slug and Lettuce with Rachel and Abi, we obviously ended up in Be at One and not so obviously ended up by the river where Abi threw up and she and I fell over looool it was sooo much fun

Thursday was fine, not much happened and I got to call Alex on the way home which was nice. Friday I worked from home/Starbucks and got to hang out with my grandparents and all that which was good, and then me and mum went to Franco Manca in Chiswick and had pizza (obviously cheeseless for me) and it was v v nice!

Saturday I bought a really cool dress, and then in the evening me, Rachel and Abi (can you see a theme emerging here) went to see Wilkinson and it was absolutely fucking live except for all the topless guys here there and everywhere. The music was sick and we'd been waiting for it for ages so it was so good!

Then we went to Big Chill in King's Cross because it was free, it was really fun and had a lovely roof terrace although the music was a bit cheesy, and yeah I don't know really but it was all in all a good night even though I get the feeling I embarrassed myself a little bit by gushing lmao but I guess we've all been there

Then yesterday and today I've felt quite sombre. Sebastian and I have been on a break that I instigated for over a week and I have no idea what the right decision to make is, which is obviously fantastic, so yeah everything is rosy :-)

Posted at 02:26 pm by ArghNotThePony
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Sunday, February 12, 2017
I overcome so you overcame

So, since the last entry

  • I've protested against Trump after work with a lovely (cough) office-made silence is complicity sign
  • Got back into my twice a week gym routine which seems to be doing wonders for how good I feel in myself
  • Went to see A Streetcar Named Desire and have a glass of wine at Hampton Hill Playhouse with Alice which was soooo fun!
  • Had a couple of after-work drinks with Carissa
  • Beat my 5km PB twice! First last Sunday and then beat that this Sunday so I'm pretty pleased
  • Went to Nour's birthday, saw her flat and did some pretty chilled predrinks before going to this bar but her utter bitch of a friend (the 'ugh, who eats Spoons food' girl) got into a fight with a bouncer and got everyone kicked out because she is Utterly Selfish
  • Facetimed Alex which was v nice
  • Got told my job is full on and I'm good at it by John Healey's political adviser which was an absolute confidence boost
  • Got told by Ruth that I'm cleverer than her (guessing she meant at my age) which was another huge confidence boost!
  • Went to Anna's with Rachel after work, watched a horror called The Boy and chatted (got Maccy's before obviously) and it was chilled and nice to catch up (god I hate that term so much)
  • Saw Lion with Sebastian, which was a really really good film
  • Went to Zizzi's with Amy and had really good food, then went to watch The Play That Goes Wrong which was actually better than I thought it'd be, despite being a bit too stupid at points, and then ended up in a Canadian pub which was actually so fun! Really really good evening
  • Today after beating my PB again I had a coffee with grandad in the gym cafe and I've seen my grandparents quite a bit which is really nice :-) not a bad week this last week!

Posted at 08:03 am by ArghNotThePony
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Sunday, January 29, 2017
Breathe + stop

This week has been nice! Just chilled out after work on Monday and Tuesday which was quite nice, on Wednesday we went to Hail Mary though!

I went to Kathrine's after work and we got ready and had some (gross) prosecco, and then went to Scape and played this weird drinking game and then got ready to go, and it was really fun! I spent all night with Kathrine and a lot of it with Sofie, Emilie and Swedish Sebastian and it was jokes, went to McDonald's with Kathrine and Sebastian after and had some banging chips and that was really nice

Thursday at work following on from that was obviously hell but got to have fish and chips with mum, nan and grandad afterwards which was v nice indeed :-) and then on Friday I got to work from home/Costa which was also nice, and then afterwards Rachel ran me down to Tesco and I do really like big Tesco ahahaha

Sebastian came round and we watched some shit TV and I made pasta and that was nice to just have a chill, then on Saturday morning I popped to Hounslow and then watched Mr. Robot's season 2 finale finally, and seriously being at work really makes watching TV in the middle of the day feel like such a luxury!

Then I started getting ready and got trains being v overdressed to go over to Mile End for Kathrine, Sofie and Kristine's birthday celebrations and I was so early but it was nice and we chatted and I talked to Emilie for a really long time which was v nice, we played a game of ring of fire, completely butchered happy birthday and it was all good!

We went to the Hoxton Pony and even the uber there was so fun! I always feel guilty per se being in an uber but it was v v fun and the club was so good too! Had a sit down and a dance and the music was really sick, really enjoyed dancing and Kathrine's friend loves grime so we had a good chat about that and a really weird dance off where I must have looked like an absolute twat but I thought I looked good at the time and that's what matters I guess! It was suuuuch a fun night out :-)

Posted at 04:27 am by ArghNotThePony
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Sunday, January 22, 2017
Whisperin', glistenin'

Quite a busy week for the first time in a while because I seem to be actually better, three weeks after bloody contracting the last thing, four weeks since the cold and five since I fucked my foot in the door at Laura's! And it feels sooooo nice

On Monday work was as usual but had a coffee with Damon which broke up the day and was v nice and then watched some crap TV at home, Tuesday I went to the gym and did an actual workout for the first time in ages and it was so ridiculously cathartic! I also wrote an article about Killer Mike which I really enjoyed, made me realise how much I miss writing even though I'm not actually sure how good I am at it

Wednesday after work I went to Pizza Express in Richmond with Amy and Alice which was so bloody lovely! I couldn't even finish the pudding because I just have no appetite in comparison with what I had before I was ill and hopefully am going to be able to keep up with that. It was a really chilled out meal and afterwards we went for a drive in Alice's car and it was v v nice

Thursday Grandad ended up going to hospital which was obviously shit but he seems to be recovering now so fingers crossed on that front, I really hope so.

Friday fucking Trump was inaugurated (lol) so we're all doomed, but except for that didn't have a bad day! Got to leave work early and saw nan and grandad for a couple of hours which was really nice, and then went to Abi's house with Rachel and we had mojitos, none of which were particularly appealing, listened to loads of good music and some Abba(???) and I posed for a photoshoot on the floor, got some good video of that, discovered Ben Chipps, got a nice video of Rachel twerking and it was so nice

Saturday I went to the gym in the morning which I really enjoyed, hung out with nan and grandad all afternoon which was v nice and Sebastian came in the evening. We had fake chicken burgers and watched Horrible Bosses and that biopic of Amy Winehouse which was fascinating and felt a bit intrusive at the same time

Today we woke up - I feel like I've hardly slept - had some food and went to get some trains, all of which were fuckin delayed or cancelled, but finally I made it to Angel for Rebecca's birthday. Me and Nour got a coffee first and sat for a while before going to this pub called the Island Queen which was v sweet and overpriced, it was really nice to see everyone and was a really chilled out afternoon which I enjoyed a lot. Roast was really nice, drinks were really nice, everyone seemed happy and relaxed and I have felt it way more this week too! :-)

Posted at 12:41 pm by ArghNotThePony
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Sunday, January 15, 2017
We'll take it from here

So, since the last entry a couple of cool things happened and then I got ill af and have hardly been able to do anything!

The day before NYE I went to Kingston with Alex, he tried some shoes and aftershave and we went to Five Guys and tried the new gross fizzy drink flavours, and then he came back to mine and we had coffee from the cafetiere that mum bought me for Christmas and peppermint tea, and listened to Kaytranada, watched the Chicken Connoisseur and chatted for a while and it was v nice :-)

On NYE, I went to Electric Brixton with Rachel and Abi and it was sooo much fun! We dropped before going in and it was good, it lasted until like 2am and we watched Disciples do a headline set and all these balloons came down for the new year and everyone was being really nice and saying happy new year to everyone and it was sick! Did it again at like 2am and Rach needed to sit down for a while so we all sat down on these seats and it was chill and just felt so relaxed, had another dance then another sit down on this ledge where we could see the whole venue and then a final dance to Shadow Child and it was just so so so fun!!

The day after I thought I was dying for the usual reason but I was actually bare ill with a fever, and I didn't leave the house for three days but I did watch Hypernormalisation by Adam Curtis finally so I guess that's good!

I got to see quite a lot of nan and grandad which was really nice, and managed to go to the pub with Abi, Rachel, Kinga and Laura but I felt pretty shit while I was there which sucked, worked from home/Starbucks the day after which I actually really enjoyed, and took Sebastian for a birthday meal afterwards.

Felt a little bit better on the Saturday and met Mary and Rebecca in Richmond, and we walked to the Roebuck and met Louisa, Rhian and Kathrine and we had a really nice chatty pub lunch and then a walk up to and through Richmond Park and saw loads of deer! That was really nice, then had a walk down the river with Mary, Kathrine and Rebecca on the way back to the station and that was v nice too. In the evening I watched the Theory of Everything with mum which was cute, and the next day hung out with nan and grandad and then watched Community and Sherlock with mum which was nice.

This last week I've been feeling weird, like ill but mentally there, and I went to the Fox with Rachel and Abi on Tuesday but I think I was still too ill to drink and I felt properly shit after it, like pukey ill.

This Friday I went up to London after work to the Slug at Waterloo for Ellie's birthday, had two weak cocktails and felt OK. It was really nice to see everyone, I hadn't seen Sam for a couple of months or Holly since like graduation so it was really cute, but I was still pretty tired. Was worth it though!

This weekend I haven't done v much, I went on a nice walk yesterday and discovered a nice pub by the water in Isleworth and I really want to go there when the weather is nicer, really enjoyed that, and hung out with nan and grandad for a couple of hours. Watched some embarrassingly shite TV with mum in the evening and have had a headache all day today but got to spend some time with nan and grandad, although grandad seems to have got something like my virus which sucks :-(

Posted at 10:05 am by ArghNotThePony
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Thursday, December 29, 2016
Merry Run the Jewels 3-mas

I accidentally haven't written in here for ages lol so starting from the 12th, after my last post:

  • We did a constituency tour in the car which I found really fun, and after work I went for drinks in Kings Cross Be at One with Lou, Kathrine, Ellie and Rebecca which was actually so fun and cheered me right up
  • Went to Southampton for Laura's birthday with Rach and Abi! We drove down which was fun and then went for a really nice dinner at Zizzi's with her and her frankly boring af housemates, then got ready quickly and had a fun predrinks, and then queued for like 10 years to get into bloody Oceana but when we actually got in it was so fun!! Laura stayed with us for most of the night and we danced to shit music and got cheap drinks and it was v v fun but then I shut my foot in her door when I got back and couldn't sleep because of the pain :-)
  • We realised in the morning my foot is actually pretty fucked and Ruth's husband brought round crutches when I got back which was nice, crutches that I ended up being on for a bloody week!
  • On the Saturday I went to London with Louisa and we had lunch at Pizza Express and then walked (hobbled) down towards South Bank via a Pret and had a wander round the Christmas market but didn't spend anything and despite the foot it was v cute
  • In the evening Abi and Rachel came round to drink wine and listen to music and we listened to the happy birthday Olivia songs and watched some crap memes and it was v v fun
  • After work the following Monday we went for a couple of drinks in the Sports which was actually pretty fun
  • Tuesday got a present from Ruth - a mini bottle of Lanson! - and went for a couple of mulled wines with Alice in the Anglers, with my best mate the crutch after work
  • Wednesday and Thursday I was properly ill but exchanged presents with Sebastian who bought me some really nice white and silver Reeboks which was nice :-)
  • On Friday I went to Richmond with Alex and had a wander round Whole Foods and a coffee before we came back to mine, made (bitty) mulled wine and drank that while listening to Childish Gambino and then watching Community which I enjoyed v much
  • Next day was Christmas Eve, went to the gym for the first time in a while because of the foot and really enjoyed that, then had a coffee in the cafe there with grandad which was v nice! Hung out with him and nan in the afternoon then watched Community and Bridget Jones with mum in the evening drinking the posh Lanson champagne that Alice bought me for my 21st!
  • Christmas Day was nice too, got some lovely clothes and some money and vouchers and a cafetiere! There was no running water in the morning so me and mum went up Whitton to get bottled but we couldn't, but Abi drove to Esher and bought some for me too which saved the day! We had some Baileys an of course a nice dinner then me and mum went for a walk and then hung out with nan and grandad a bit more before going home to watch Bridget Jones 2 and have prosecco and I found out that Run the Jewels 3 had been released which is like the best Christmas present ever!!
  • Boxing Day me and Rach did our annual shopping trip, I bought yet another black mesh top and some really cool bright pink work trousers and that was fun, saw my mum and grandparents for a while and then went to Abi's where Jen was(!!!) with Rachel and Laura. We had a bottle of wine each and did our secret santa presents, Laura had me and got me like a care package thing with dry shampoo, hairspray, Jager, two books, makeup wipes, etc etc!! And it was v v cute and I was like aw I have the best friends
  • Then we went to the Blucher and had a couple of bottles there before going into Kingston to Viper Rooms which wasn't actually that bad! The music was quite good and Jen got with this guy hahaha and it was just a v good night
  • Tuesday I went to Staines with my mumma and finally found some black work trousers that suit me! We got lunch in the M&S cafe and had a wander and she got a new phone and it was v nice but v fuckin cold
  • Yesterday I went to Amy's with Alice and we half watched Suicide Squad and chatted and had the culinary genius that is spaghetti and fish fingers, and it was v nice to catch up and not really spend any money
  • After that I went to Winter Wonderland with Rachel, Laura and Abi and it was actually really fun even though I've been in a weird mood all week and wasn't necessarily looking forward to it, we went to the big tent with the stage and had a couple of drinks there before going to the carousel bar and that was fun too, got a crepe and went in a fun house and that was hilarious, really really enjoyed it! Went to Maccy's afterwards obv, but had a really really lovely time :-)
  • Today I feel really down for god knows what reason - maybe months of pretending I Am Fine All The Time?! - so I went to the gym and now am in bed with my electric blanket listening to RTJ3 and soon I'll read and it's so nice to just have some time on my own.

Posted at 06:18 am by ArghNotThePony
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Sunday, December 11, 2016
Donde esta la blblioteca

Done some cool stuff since the last entry and some less cool stuff - such as getting hugely sucked into Community again...but except for that:

  • Two different people told me I'm good at my job and I had fish and chips with my fam :-)
  • Went to lunch in the Fallow Deer with Amy and Liz, who I haven't seen for like a year, before going for a v cold walk in Bushy Park which was really nice!
  • Went to Toddla T's Winter Carnival with Abi and Rachel and fucking Sean Paul was a surprise guest?!?!?! It was soooo sick, we saw Nadia Rose and Charlie Sloth, and Redlight did a really good set and we were all out of it but it was really really good!! We went outside and the oval construction outside and the view were amazing, Rach got all emotional and we were like lol ya pussy but it was actually v lovely
  • Went to an anxiety inducing and terrible work meal, the less to be said about that the better lololol
  • Facetimed Alex which is always nice
  • Went to the Slug and then to Be at One with Rachel and Abi, drank copious amounts of wine and found prop Santa hats and glasses and candy canes and me and Abi screamed some 80s lyrics to each other and danced the shit out of everything and it was gr9 fun and reminded me of how we went out a couple of summers ago - cue sad face
  • Had annual leave on Thursday, went to the gym which was great, hung out with my grandparents, watched some Community and then in the evening Rach came round to watch the Louis Theroux Scientology documentary and a documentary about suicides on the Golden Gate bridge, and we drove to Maccy's as well n it was cute
  • Me and my colleague sacked off work for an hour to chat which was fun
  • Sebastian came round and we cooked chilli con quorne with jalapenos and it was soooo nice! In the morning we watched some Community and chilled, in the afternoon I went to the Press Room with Amy then hung out with my grandparents and had the pengest curry with mumma
  • Today I did 6km in the gym and am now lifting 15kg, which might not be much but it's way more than I could do a year ago! It's been quite a good week :-)

Posted at 09:58 am by ArghNotThePony
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